La Familia with Andrea

Feeling the weight of her Venezuelan roots and the echoes of her family's journey, Andrea opens her heart to us, recounting the profound ways her personal history has been sculpted by her relationship with Jesus Christ.  

Andrea bears a powerful witness of the ties that bind us all - those to our ancestors, to our faith, and to the enduring hope for a better tomorrow. The harrowing account of her grandmother's struggle to join her family in the United States amidst Venezuela's turmoil and the sobering reality of COVID-19's grip on the world, remind us that we are all part of a larger story. As Andrea shares the solace she finds in connecting with her lineage and the personal revelations that guide her life, it's clear that the memories of Jesus Christ are not just historical footnotes but living, breathing anchors in our ever-changing world.

Please reach out to me if you are interested in sharing your story! I would LOVE to hear from you. :)

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Transcript

Lily: 0:06

Hello everyone and welcome to. More Than Coincidence, Remembering Jesus Christ in your Story as the author and finisher of our faith, our Savior writes personal experiences into each of our lives which can later strengthen, empower and bring us peace upon reflection. This podcast is dedicated to sharing these anchoring memories from everyone's unique stories in order to collectively remember and testify of the reality of Jesus Christ and His presence in our lives. I'm your host, Lily, and I'm very excited to share these experiences together. Hey, good evening everybody. Tonight we have Andrea. Welcome to the podcast. Thank you, Happy to be here.

Andrea: 0:47

Will you just introduce yourself a little bit. Yeah, I'm Andrea. I am let's see a stay-at-home mom. I have four kids, four wonderful kids, all beautiful. My husband and I have been married for like 12 years no, he's going to make fun of me Almost 14 years. Next month it'll be 14 years, so it feels like it's been forever, but also just a day. So, yeah, and I don't know, I guess, a lot of my background I'm actually going to talk about, but born and raised here in Utah, so yeah, I guess.

Lily: 1:29

I should. Any hobbies, yes, any fun hobbies.

Andrea: 1:31

I am okay. I'm actually going to talk about it today a little bit.

Lily: 1:35

We're going to get to know all of you. Yeah, really, though, it's going to be all of it ties together.

Andrea: 1:40

I guess I'm kind of boring, but my husband makes fun of me because I have granny hobbies and so one of them is family history. I will literally go for hours and just.

Lily: 1:53

Really.

Andrea: 1:56

Yeah, it's funny, it has to do with my story, but yeah, that is my biggest hobby and then I do gardening. I started that last year and it was so fun and I loved being outside and anyway.

Lily: 2:08

So those are like my two things that I just love Awesome and yeah, so that's when you said granny hobbies, I thought you were going to say crocheting, and I was like me too, I loved crocheting. I wish.

Andrea: 2:18

I wish my mom crochets, but I never. Yeah, I don't know, I'm not coordinated enough to do it. I'm not, it's tricky.

Lily: 2:27

I go through like phases where I'm like I love to crochet and it's usually around the holidays. I'm like everybody's getting you a crochet gift, and then I like kind of poop out at the end and I'm like, okay, I can't crochet anymore. My wrist I'm getting carpal tunnel. I can't do this anymore.

Andrea: 2:37

Oh yeah, no, I love it, Like it's just it's so funny because I'm like, do your family history and my husband's, just like you're such a grandma and I'm like it's not even like that much of a grandma hobby. What are you talking about?

Lily: 2:48

You're like well, when I get to heaven, there's going to be a lot more people happy to see me than you. Yeah, Because I did that work.

Andrea: 2:55

He's going to die when he hears that he's made that joke too. So it's great, it's fine, that's awesome. Yeah, Like I, um, it's funny because it's just like that that ties in a lot with my story. So I guess, like um, let's just get to your story.

Lily: 3:11

So, andrea, let me ask you the question then. So what memories do you have in your life that you reflect on, that remind you of our Savior Jesus Christ and anger you to him?

Andrea: 3:21

Oh my gosh, there's so many and like so, oh, and you asked me to do a trigger warning really quick.

Lily: 3:28

So I just want to give a trigger warning to anybody listening that we do mention sexual abuse. We're not going to, you know, talk about it in detail, but it does play a part in the story and so we just want to let anybody know in case you want to skip forward a little bit, but most of the story is not going to be that, so we want you to tune in so so keep listening, so sorry.

Andrea: 3:51

You're good, so go ahead. Um, so, yeah, so there's, there's a lot of it's. It's funny, um, a lot of these things like didn't have anything to do with each other until the last few months actually, that I've been looking back and I see how connected they are and it's just, it's so beautiful because it's just like I don't know like it's my story.

Lily: 4:15

Like.

Andrea: 4:15

This is just it's crazy how connected it is and so, um. So I guess I'll start. Um, my parents are from Venezuela and uh, um, one of the things that like is a huge core part of me is just my family and my heritage. Like, I just like I'm gonna, I'm gonna tell a story because my husband requested it.

Andrea: 4:41

He loves this story and it's so cute because, like I love this story, but like he just he was like are you going to talk about it? And I'm like, yeah, okay, but yeah, to give context, cause I'm obviously Latina and then, um, lds too, and so there's like this huge focus on family, right, like just family is everything from both directions.

Lily: 5:01

You've got it From both directions, yeah.

Andrea: 5:04

So so, um, so I guess I'll start there. Obviously, this was before I was born um that my parents, you know, like they I'm going to talk about their love story actually um, so, uh, my dad, his family, um, they found the church, let's see, when my dad was, I think, 12, I might be getting that wrong, but I think 12 and um, they're pioneers there. Like they, you know, like my grandparents, they were devout Catholics and then, all of a sudden, they were introduced to the church and they just hit the ground running.

Lily: 5:38

Yeah, beautiful.

Andrea: 5:41

And anyway, it was, uh, a few years into it. There was some ward drama, I guess I should say like there was. There was someone that was kind of being inappropriate with my aunt, yeah, and kind of proposed to her when she was 16. Whoa, I know like this is going to be again, since I'm Latina, this is going to be like a film of that. I was going to say so, um, so, yeah, so he, like he was being inappropriate with her and my grandpa, um, oh, my gosh, I love talking about him. He is just the coolest person to me. He, he like was out in the jungles of Venezuela when he was in the military, like he's, he's a rough guy, he's a rough guy, okay. And so, um, and he had a temper, and so, um, my aunt let him know about what was going on. And this person came over to the house to basically like, try to talk to my grandpa about you know whether that could happen or not? And my grandma opened the door and she was just like, oh, you really really got to go.

Andrea: 6:47

Like you need to leave, you know. And uh, he was just like no, like I, I'm here, I have like a serious inquiry to make, and you know, and she's like we know and you need to leave, and that's when my grandpa rounded the corner with the machete, yep, so he got out of there really quick after that, right, and so, um, so, yeah, so that's like a little glimpse into my, my grandpa. He's a family man. He will, you know, like defend his family and so. So anyway, and this person kind of like had a like uh, um, he was well known in the ward and like had, you know, a position of power. I guess I should say so. So it kind of like tore people apart.

Andrea: 7:32

Like they were just like he would never do that. But Dia's family is just, you know right.

Lily: 7:36

Full of it.

Andrea: 7:38

Right, you know, like uh, so, so it kind of like split people and a lot of people did not like my grandpa. After that Fast forward a few more years and, um, president, then elder Hinkley, um, back then at this time he came to Venezuela to visit and it was because he was organizing a second stake. Um, venezuela was just one stake at that time, and so he, it was growing, and so he, he came down to you know, to reorganize things.

Lily: 8:10

To reorganize things.

Andrea: 8:11

And so, with that, he needed a new patriarch in the state. Yeah, Um, in this new state. And uh, so he showed up and he said, um, I think that Baltazar should be the patriarch, my grandpa. And um, oh, that caused it.

Lily: 8:31

I was going to say Uproar yeah.

Andrea: 8:33

It was. It was pretty bad. And so, um, elder Hinkley was like you know what? Um, obviously we're not going to get anywhere in this conversation. Let's, let's end the meeting here and we'll, you know, we'll talk tomorrow morning. And, um, we know these details because of his assistant. Actually, uh-huh, and he, um, he and um, he did, uh, yeah, yeah, there he is. Or, elder Hinckley pulled him over and he was like hey, just so, you know, like I want the Diaz family here tomorrow morning, so just make sure that they're here tomorrow morning. And so the next day this is the story that my husband wanted me to tell, by the way, because it's pretty crazy. But Elder Hinckley was just like, yeah, so we're gonna call the patriarch assistant I don't know his name, sorry, I hope you ever hear this but, I, don't know your name, but his assistant came over to help and he's like can you pull a file out of this folder?

Andrea: 9:35

you know, like of this box and whoever we pull it's who it's gonna be, is gonna be the patriarch. And he's like, yeah, sure, so he pulls it without looking or anything. And it was my grandpa, and so it was so funny because he's just like any questions and of course the room was silent, right, like seems fair enough to me, right? Yeah, so it's great. So that's the fun story. I guess he was sustained, right. He was called to be the patriarch. He served for many years and my dad has like some of the coolest stories about it. And anyway, that was actually the reason why my parents met. So my mom was in the other stake and for some reason she just was not getting a hold of the patriarch, like they just kept on missing each other, and so it was just like, okay, well, maybe I can just go to the next, the other patriarch. And so she called, and my dad was the one who was running things for him.

Andrea: 10:38

He would take the phone calls and stuff, and so that's when they first talked, and so he scheduled her patriarchal blessing and my mom got her patriarchal blessing From my grandpa. That's really special.

Andrea: 10:51

Yeah and that actually and I should kind of like back up too just to explain my mom's side of the family too. So that's my dad's side of the family, my mom's side of the family. She met the missionaries when she was a little bit older, I think, or no, I think my dad was 10 and my mom was 12. Maybe that's what, like I was like ah, that doesn't sound exactly right, but anyway, I hope those are real.

Andrea: 11:17

But, yeah, younger, so, anyway. So she started taking the lessons with a few of her siblings, and she got baptized. And my grandparents didn't, though, but they didn't have any like hard feelings or anything Like they weren't against the church and they allowed them to get baptized and everything, but they just they didn't feel like they should get baptized for whatever reason, and so and my grandma, she was a character and she's like oh, I love the missionaries, I love the church.

Andrea: 11:50

I just I cannot give up my coffee right now. Like she's, you know, like she's a Venezuelan woman, like they, they drink a lot of coffee and so anyway. So she was like, so you know, like, baptize me when I'm dead you know, like that was the joke. And so she told my mom that several times and so so, anyway, so I had like this spiritual giant on my dad's side, and then I also, I also think that my grandma was this spiritual giant, but we, you know, like she obviously didn't get baptized.

Lily: 12:18

And so, but you can still have a relationship with God.

Andrea: 12:21

Exactly she she still had that connection and but it was just not her time to get baptized. So you know it's fine, but so fast, you know, back back forward to my mom. She got her patriarchal blessing and it was beautiful. And then, of course, if you like, I think it was a few years later- I can't remember the exact timeline, but my parents got married.

Andrea: 12:49

She had a really close relationship with my grandpa, and my dad did too. He was the youngest boy, and so they were just real tight, really tight, and so I grew up hearing about, you know, this amazing man, and what happened was after they got married and after my older brother was born. I have one aunt that lives here in the United States and she was like you should come here, you should go to BYU, you should, you know. So my dad was like okay, we're making the move right.

Andrea: 13:25

So he moved up here to the States and and my mom stayed back for a little bit, but anyway, he moved up here, started going to school and then my mom came and she was pregnant with me Uh-huh, very pregnant with me.

Lily: 13:42

I feel so bad.

Andrea: 13:43

I'm like oh, flying that pregnant, that's crazy, but yeah. So they came over to the States and the plan was always to return back to Venezuela, but we'll talk about it later. But things just didn't work out and so it was a long distance relationship for the family, right, that was back in 1990 that they moved here, and so a few years later my grandpa actually passed away. He it was 96. So I never really got to meet him. It was kind of it's just one of those things where it was like it was difficult because I didn't understand what was going on. And then there were other circumstances because my dad wasn't a citizen, he was here on a student visa. He wasn't supposed to go back, but he went back because of, obviously, he had to go to his dad's funeral and so, and it was very unexpected and so, anyway, so he went.

Andrea: 14:44

he was gone for two months and I was just like what is going on, you know, at six years old. So it was hard, but he was able to come back and then, a few years after that, to get into a little bit of history and politics. The president Chavis he was elected right and he was the one who was promising a lot of things. And my dad was just like I don't feel right about this guy.

Andrea: 15:13

And my mom too she was actually like very, you know, like I don't like where this is going. And so my parents, unknowingly, kind of like my dad, got to see my grandma one more time too because of the funeral and like she actually lived with us for a little bit too. But that's a whole other story and I don't remember it because I was like two and three years old so I never met my grandma on you know, like on my mom's side and my dad's side it was, you know, she was very young, growing up and so, and then I never met either of my grandpas either. My father's dad passed in 96, my other grandpa, he's still around, but he's got severe dementia and so because of the political situation it's just really hard and we don't want him traveling either, so it's really hard, but anyway, so it was back then they didn't realize that this was, you know, like one of the last times that they were gonna see their parents.

Andrea: 16:20

And so it was 98. And my dad was just like you know what, we're gonna stay and we're gonna make it work here, right In Utah, in Utah. And so, and again, I was born and raised here, and so I grew up without my extended family you know, I only had that one aunt, which not that she isn't great and wonderful, it's actually her birthday, so she hears this yeah happy birthday.

Lily: 16:46

Shout out to my aunt happy birthday.

Andrea: 16:49

But she, you know it was her husband and her son at the time and so, but I had this entire family in Venezuela that I didn't get to know right now.

Lily: 17:02

Well, and that's big family's huge. I'm sure that your parents were both feeling that heartache of not being with their family.

Andrea: 17:07

Oh yeah, and I remember when I was younger it was so, you know, like this was again like late 90s. It was hard to call long distance and that's the thing all growing up. There was always something there was something that was making it hard to communicate with family, and now we have social media, right, but it was still like my grandma didn't know how to use it.

Andrea: 17:32

Social media right, so like so. Yeah, so it was always really hard to communicate with family, so I grew up not knowing my extended family, and both my parents had big families like several, several siblings, and so I just I grew up in a different culture than you know like, cause there's the Venezuelan culture and then the Utah culture, and you know like, even though I was raised in Utah, I was still raised by Venezuelan culture Right.

Andrea: 18:03

Yeah, so it was just like. So it was kind of weird and I never felt like I really fit in anywhere, yeah and so anyway. So it was hard because family was everything to me, even when I was small. Like I remember in the fourth grade I was sitting there after winter break and the teacher was just asking, like what you know? Like what did everyone do? And yeah, all of my classmates are like, oh, I went to grandma's house, went and saw my cousins, and I was just sitting there like devastated because it's like I never get to see my grandma.

Lily: 18:36

You know like.

Andrea: 18:37

I never get to see my cousins, right? They're so out of reach for me, right? Yeah, like it was a major heartache for me growing up.

Andrea: 18:46

And it was, yeah, it was just, it was difficult. And so you know, to get on to like the next part of the story, that's kind of like the context, the background of you know, like family is everything. My culture, you know, my heritage, my culture, my church, all of those things come together and family is just everything, right, and I didn't get to grow up with my family. Yeah, or not a lot, or maybe I should say in a way that I wanted, like in a way I envisioned, right. However, with that being said, I grew up hearing stories constantly, just constantly Again, about my grandpa. My grandma too I don't wanna leave her out, I haven't talked about her very much, but, like his wife, grew up with stories and so I just you felt like you knew them but you didn't like know them.

Andrea: 19:50

Yes, I had a relationship with my grandpa, even though he had already passed away, so it was like so there was that. And then I knew the stories of my grandmas and I loved them. Like, oh my gosh, my mom's mom was hilarious and just had all of these like she cussed like a sailor. She had like all of these characteristics that just made her so funny, you know. And so, anyway, she's like this tiny woman and just Just a fiery Latina like just-.

Andrea: 20:19

Yeah, just fiery, like she would put you in your place. Right, sounds about right, but she was also like so, so giving and so loving and one of my favorite stories about her is actually before my parents got married.

Andrea: 20:33

She talked to my mom. She was just like so you're gonna get married. And she was just like yeah, and it was. You know, they had a short engagement but she was like or no, this wasn't even before, or this was before the engagement. But she was just like you know what, if you make it to marriage now that you're Mormon, right?

Lily: 20:53

If it's back, then it was fine.

Andrea: 20:54

Now that you're Mormon, that means that you guys shouldn't be doing anything before marriage.

Lily: 20:59

And she's like, yeah, that's right.

Andrea: 21:00

And she's like, okay, if you make it to marriage and you are able to make it to the temple, because you know that was, they didn't have a temple close to them, but that was the goal. The goal, yeah, she's like I will quit smoking. And this woman had smoked a pack a day, like a lot, wow, since she was 13 years old, like young, oh my gosh, yeah, and so that's a big promise, right. And my mom she was like, yeah, like we, I made it to marriage, so you gotta quit smoking. And she was like done, cold turkey, never smoked again, right, so like she was just. There are so many stories about this woman that I'm just like she's so endearing and so anyway, yeah, so there's just like.

Lily: 21:49

I know your grandma and your grandma.

Andrea: 21:52

So it's like it's funny, because I look back and I'm like, oh my gosh, even though, like I didn't know them, I had a relationship with them. So that's the context, that's the background, and then to move on, this is where it, you know, kind of gets dicey in my teenage years. So we got along with this family. They were also Venezuelan. My dad knew them back in Venezuela and they moved here to Utah as well, and so we were really close, like his best friend was one of the brothers in this family and we hung out with that family all the time and they became a sort of extended family for me.

Andrea: 22:31

They weren't, you know, blood family, but like I just adored them as much as I would a family like blood family, and so we were doing everything together. Christmas, new Year's for Venezuelans, we do like huge New Year's parties.

Andrea: 22:48

And so like every year, dancing with this family, really close to this family. I saw, you know, all of the cousins like cousins, right, they're. You know, like all of the kids in this family like cousins. And so, anyway, when I was 13, though, the brother, the oldest brother, he molested me, and it, you know it was this was actually the second time in my life that that had happened, and but this one, you know, I was 13 and I was very, you know, cognizant of what was happening especially with my history and so to we'll call back the story of my grandpa and the machete.

Andrea: 23:41

My dad is a lot like my grandpa and so, because I had already gone through it, I was just like you know what this is going to destroy so much if I talk about this, so I'm just gonna keep it to myself. My family's gonna be gone. Yep, like yeah, it was rough because it was just like.

Lily: 24:04

I was like.

Andrea: 24:04

I'm gonna be gone. I'm gonna be gone. Yeah, it was rough because it was just like I had this entire family, that, or you know, like second family, and I didn't have my other family.

Lily: 24:18

And so and you didn't want to be the one to like break it Exactly.

Andrea: 24:22

Yeah, and it was just and I knew it would break. I knew it would break.

Andrea: 24:25

And so, and so I. It's funny because I was 13. Like this was, I grew up really quick, unfortunately, and so one of the things that kind of like kept me afloat, I guess cause I, you know, I numbed it out, but I was just like I need to. I know I can't live with this by myself, right, like this is pretty heavy. However, you know, like I can't all, I can't break my family up, so what can I do? And I just, you know, I was just like you know, like I've been taught forgiveness. You know like you have to forgive people and it'll bring me peace, right, like that's what I've always been told. And so.

Andrea: 25:14

I prayed my little heart out constantly to be able to move past this Fast forward a few years. I'm 15, I'm about to start dating. I'm, you know, like. I'm on the verge of turning 16.

Lily: 25:28

And there was Kim.

Andrea: 25:29

Sinieras yes, yes, exactly, I had one of those and the boy I really liked was there, you know, like my first boyfriend, and so that actually was the catalyst of holy crap. Like you know, I am going to have to learn how to be connected to someone when I've been keeping people at arm's length right and.

Andrea: 25:54

I couldn't verbalize this back then, but that's basically what it was. And so I started having just so much anxiety and leading up to because I knew as soon as I turned 16, I was going to date this boy right, like we were just waiting until then, and so so I got.

Andrea: 26:14

I can't even remember what it was about, but I got into this huge argument with my parents one night and I just screamed like you have no idea what I've been through. And I guess my mom was just so intuitive and she was just like what happened to you, like straight face dead cold, you know she was like what happened to you? And I was just like oh, nothing Like you know like oh no, no, no, no, gotta walk it back, gotta walk this back. And she was like no, what happened?

Andrea: 26:47

And I was just like you know, like trying to make excuses for what I said, and you know like I'm just a dumb teenager. Don't listen to me and she looked at me and she was just like, was it this person? And at this point my dad's just sitting there quietly, right.

Lily: 27:04

Yeah.

Andrea: 27:07

And that's when I broke down and I started crying and I was like yeah, and explained what happened. Well, not even everything, I just explained that something happened and my dad just quietly stood up to find the machete yeah, it was one o'clock in the morning at this point, I think because we had just been arguing for so long and so he just like got up and I saw him walk into his closet and he was getting dressed, you know, to go kill this man. And so I just got dressed, you know, to go kill this man. And I just screamed at him and I was just like this is why I didn't tell you, because I knew you were gonna go to jail, my family was gonna be broken up and then I would lose everyone right.

Andrea: 27:53

And that calmed him down and he was just like, oh, sat down and he was just like, okay, yeah, you know like, okay, hear you loud and clear. This was, you know like right before I was 16 and my parents were phenomenal. They were like what do you need? What should we do, right? And so we went and reported the guy and started the prosecution and everything. And we didn't know this at the time because we, I kind of like started distancing myself from him too, but I couldn't let them know, right.

Lily: 28:28

So it was just like this awkward thing where you still see him but you don't wanna be around him, Exactly.

Andrea: 28:34

And I think that they caught onto it because we saw him less over the years. But he was actually diagnosed with some disease I can't remember exactly what it was, but it was just, you know like it was pretty severe, it was serious, and so we started going to court and it was dragged out for an entire year. Every single month I would have to go and I would have to sit there and face him right, and it was exhausting because there was so much turmoil in my family about this too.

Andrea: 29:12

And so again, like it was just like oh my gosh, my family is having issues because of this and I blamed myself for a lot of it and so and it's funny because my mom was so clear Like, and now, being a mother, I'm just like it makes sense now, yeah she was so clear. She was just like. You did not do anything to deserve this. Do not put this on yourself.

Lily: 29:39

She was constantly telling me that, as every victim like, that's really cool, because every victim needs to know that it is not your fault.

Andrea: 29:46

They were so like my parents were stellar during this and but it was still really hard and my mom had a really hard time with it and she had issues that she was facing mental health issues and stuff like that, and so lots of stuff just happened all throughout this time and it was just all compact and it was high school and high school is already a hard enough time, and so I just lost hope, like I just lost hope of things working out.

Andrea: 30:19

It was just, I was just trying to get through the week. I you know I it was just such a different time.

Lily: 30:28

It was ready for the end to be there. Like can this just be over.

Andrea: 30:32

I didn't even make like, it's hard to even admit because it's one of my major insecurities. But I didn't graduate high school because I was just not present in high school. I was constantly just at home trying to just survive, right and so, which is okay by the way, thanks. I know it's like. It's one of those things where I'm Honestly, that's okay.

Andrea: 30:57

I've come to accept, because it's not like I was, you know, like a bad student or anything. I immediately went over and got my, you know, like my diploma afterwards, right, but it was just, I was just, I had no idea what life had for me, Right, and so I just had, like this hopelessness, yeah. And so, yeah, he, finally they, you know, prosecuted him and the crazy thing was, so he went to jail or prison and he, he served his term there, but then he was deported because he wasn't here legally, right, and so he was sent back to Venezuela. Now, you know, we can fast forward a little bit and I can kind of shift gears, but my husband, like this is our story now and this is probably one of the things like it's so funny cause I'm like this is so long, but I promise it all you know comes together.

Andrea: 32:02

It all comes together. So I met my husband right out of high school, right out of high school, and I was one of those young women that I was like I'm going to date for at least a year before I commit to anything. I'm not going to be one of those girls, that was me too.

Andrea: 32:19

Yeah. So I was just like nope, like gotta, you know, gotta make sure that I date someone for long enough and I'm going to wait until I'm 21. Cause, you know, like that was the only thing, like I was just like I just want to have some time to just and honestly you deserve that, let's just be real.

Lily: 32:35

You need a break, yeah.

Andrea: 32:37

So it was just like I just did not want to like obviously I liked boys, but you know and I wanted to like date around, but I didn't want to do anything serious, you know. And so so it was just funny, because then I go hang out with my friends and we go to a hot tub, and then there's this guy that's just super cute, has the most beautiful eyes and anyway.

Andrea: 33:00

So we just started talking and it was. It was so funny because we were like he was kind of following me around for the night and like I would follow him back and you know. But like we were, we were kind of talking the entire night but there was one point that I was just like. I know you from somewhere. Where do I know you from Like? And he's just like I don't know Like and he's like. I mean you seem familiar but I don't know who you are Like.

Lily: 33:27

I don't think so.

Andrea: 33:28

I interrogated this poor boy for 20 minutes and I was just like, are you sure, Like my dad worked, you know, like at this building that was adjacent to the building that you worked at.

Andrea: 33:41

Maybe like anyway maybe there was something, but I could not connect it and I was just like that was just so weird. But then, yeah, we started dating and you know, time went by. Now this comes to my patriarchal blessing Again. I had a really tough time when I was a teenager and so I wasn't even thinking about that, and when my husband and I were dating I was like I should go get that you know, like I should go get that because things are kind of getting serious and you know, patriarchal blessings are always, like they always mention husbands.

Andrea: 34:15

You know like, anyway, from my limited knowledge of patriarchal blessings, and so, anyway, so I scheduled my patriarchal blessing and oh, and I should add my mom actually. So she had her patriarchal blessing by my grandpa right, and she read it to us and it was beautiful and it was tailored perfectly to her, and anyway it got lost. We don't know what happened. She lost her copy and then when she wrote you know headquarters, they're like we can't find it, we can't find it, which was devastating for my mom I would be crying my eyes out.

Andrea: 34:54

Yeah, especially, you know, like because my grandpa had passed.

Lily: 34:58

Yeah, keeping her connected in her parents.

Andrea: 34:59

Yeah, so it was just like it was so bad. So she was like, oh my gosh, I had such a good relationship with him and I had all of these like beautiful things that even before like he knew her. Yeah, that he told me and anyway. So I grew up with first of all, my crazy amazing grandpa, and he's a patriarch which is just so cool in and of itself, right. So I just like, when I made that appointment, I was just like, oh, I kind of had like this dread.

Lily: 35:32

And.

Andrea: 35:32

I was just like what if I don't have an amazing patriarchal blessing, right, and I had scheduled my mom, they actually okayed it for my mom to get a second one, and so we went and got our patriarchal blessings the same day. Now this was on my birthday when I turned 19,. Also the day after I got engaged.

Lily: 35:57

Little late for the guidance ahead of time, but you know.

Andrea: 36:00

Yeah, and so I was just like OK, well, I just need some kind of confirmation. I need to know that it's going to be for me. You know, like I need it to be personalized and obviously, like, obviously it comes from Heavenly Father. But I was just like how is this patriarch that's never met me before, Right?

Andrea: 36:23

Going to know, and so anyway. So it was an incredible experience. My mom went first. Oh my gosh, hers was beautiful and she was bawling her eyes out, and afterwards she was like those were your grandpa's words, like the phrases that he used were your grandpa's words, and it was different. You know, like it was a different blessing, but it was like it was there.

Andrea: 36:51

He was there in the room and so obviously I didn't hear this at this point, you know, and it was my turn, and I was just like, oh my gosh, what if I was just praying and I'm like, please, please, let this be personalized for me, that I know that I'm being spoken to and the first thing that the patriarch talks about is that I have a gift. And I was just like my ears perked up and I'm like what? I'm not gifted, but I'm paraphrasing, of course, but it was. You had so many friends in the premortal existence and, sorry, you're good and you will recognize them in this life, and you promised that you would do everything you could to help them get back to Heavenly Father. And they made that same promise to you and you will recognize them on the side of the veil.

Andrea: 37:51

And I was just like what, how could he have known that? And so I opened my eyes and that was the first time I saw my husband crying. He was my fiance at that point, right, but he was just bawling like a baby. It was adorable and so, anyway. So it was just like it was this beautiful and immediate confirmation that it wasn't about my grandpa, right.

Andrea: 38:17

Like as much as I love him and as much as it would have been special to have something from him. Right, it was about my Heavenly Father, and so that's the moment in life where I learned that I could rely on my patriarchal blessing. It was amazing. And so again, well, fast forward. That was like. My patriarchal blessing means so much to me. It's just crazy. I read it all the time.

Andrea: 38:46

And so a few years go by and it's the Pason Temple Open House and we went. It was my husband and I and I think my mother-in-law I know my mother-in-law was there and I think my sister-in-law and her family. But we were all there and we were outside waiting to go into the temple and I was just looking around at the grounds and I saw a familiar face and it was one of the family members of the guy who had abused me, his wife and I was just like, oh, you know, I kind of shocked to see her there because I wasn't expecting to see her. And then I saw her kids, one by one. I recognized all the kids and I'm like, oh my gosh, they're all here. And again, her husband had been deported, so I wasn't expecting to see him.

Andrea: 39:47

But I did, and it was at the temple of all places.

Andrea: 39:53

And so it kind of hit me with like a brick wall. When I saw him, I just kind of like I actually audibly kind of like gasped and my husband just like turned to me and he's just like you, ok, and I'm like that's him, you know like I pointed over to him and he knew immediately and he was just like do you want me to go? Say something? Like what do you need? Like immediately jumped in and I was so grateful but I was shocked because my prayers had been answered and it was in that moment that I realized I was just like, oh my gosh, I've forgiven this man. Like I had no, nothing in my heart.

Andrea: 40:36

But you know, like almost you know love, but not not.

Andrea: 40:43

You know, people are like what when they hear my you know, but forgiveness, like true forgiveness, yeah, it was just like you know what, like you did something horrible, but I don't hold it against you and it's I have let go of that, it has no power over me.

Andrea: 40:59

And it was so incredible because it was at the temple that I got this confirmation that I, you know, like that I had forgiven someone who had done something so terrible to me, right, and so so to kind of tie it in at this point. I've learned I can rely on my patriarchal blessing, I can rely on, you know, like these, these promptings when I get or when I go to the temple, so. So those are, you know, like kind of the messages of these things that had happened when I, while I was growing up, so fast forward now to 2020, to, yeah, 2022. So at this point I had kind of given up hope of like ever meeting the majority of my extended family. I have one cousin that's come to live here and she lives up by my aunt, and so I've gotten to see her. But again, you know, like it's just like I wish I could see all of my family, right, and especially my grandma because and this is your grandma on your mom's side, or your dad's side, my mom's side, your mom's side.

Lily: 42:15

So my, the feisty one, the feisty one.

Andrea: 42:17

Exactly Got it. I mean, they were both feisty, but you know, like this one is a little bit more feisty. The cold turkey with smoking, yes, yes, and so my, my, my dad's mom had passed away in 2012. And so so, at this point, I've lost my, my dad's parents, right, and I didn't really get to experience them here in this life. Right, I haven't met most of my family, right, and in 2022, there was some legislation that was approved because a lot of the, a lot of the people that are crossing the border right now are Venezuelan, yep, and and so, in order to kind of like curb that, they made it so that you could sponsor your family or petition for your family to come over way easier for Venezuelans.

Lily: 43:06

Right.

Andrea: 43:07

And so when this happened, my mom was like, oh my gosh, we might have a chance to actually bring your grandma over Right At this point. My grandma has been eating just you know what they can get for years and she had been, you know, like there was a definite case for persecution, like political persecution, right. She had gotten beaten up outside of her home, you know, and again she was her grandma.

Lily: 43:41

Yeah, Venezuela is not a safe place it is not a safe place.

Andrea: 43:43

I've never been back because of that, Like my dad actually specifically was like you are not allowed to go back and you know we're Latin, so we still listen to our parents when we're adults. Like that is, you're not allowed to go to Venezuela. Okay, see puppy. Yes, exactly.

Andrea: 44:02

So I've never been back to meet my family, and you know I'm friends with them on social media. But again, my grandma was an on social media. Right, it's not the same, yeah, so, but at that same around the same time, one of my mom's best friends from childhood got a phone. She was able to get a phone and so she had access to social media. She had Facebook Messenger. Because of that, my mom was able to talk to my Nona. Oh sorry, I call her Nona.

Andrea: 44:30

She's my grandma, so Nona is my mom's mom. She was able to talk to her mom all the time my Nona all the time, and one time I finally got to talk to her. Like this was the first time in over a decade that I was able to talk to my Nona. And it was amazing, like it was just oh my gosh, and she's so funny, she is so sweet and so funny, and so so, when this legislation went through, my mom was like I have a chance right, and because of everything that had happened when I was a teenager and like just life in general, I developed this narrative that things just don't work out.

Andrea: 45:13

So when my mom said that, I actually immediately went to my husband and I was just like, if this doesn't work out, like I don't wanna hope, I don't wanna hope, right, right. But you know, like how do you not hope? And so so my parents started the paperwork and at that point I just I let it creep in, and it was my mom and I my mom lives with me right now- my parents do, and we were, you know, like that Christmas. I just turned to my mom and I was just like next year, next year, this is gonna be different.

Lily: 45:54

You know like just getting so excited.

Andrea: 45:57

So excited, so so excited and we were planning like the Disney trip that we were gonna take her on.

Lily: 46:04

She will know America.

Andrea: 46:06

Right, yeah, I was just like you know we were. She has had such a tough time in Venezuela that I was like I just want her twilight years to just be Joy.

Lily: 46:16

Joy, like pure joy, where she can just Great grandkids Exactly, fun laughter Exactly.

Andrea: 46:22

And so we, you know, we were making plans. And then I don't know if you've ever gone through a sponsorship process and stuff. It takes a while and it's a pain in the butt and anyway. So we had just gotten everything in and we were waiting and we had heard from another Venezuelan that things were happening for them and they had gotten everything approved. So you're hoping that you're in the pipeline.

Lily: 46:48

Right.

Andrea: 46:49

So we were like, oh my gosh, we're weeks away from this, yeah, waiting by your phone or by your email like refreshing it every hour, just constantly. And you know, I was just like, I was prepping the kids, my kids, to meet their great grandma Right. And then February hit and she caught COVID and again she was a smoker for decades.

Lily: 47:13

Right.

Andrea: 47:14

And so I just I spiraled so hard and I was just like I know this isn't gonna work out and I was so angry because I was just like keep in mind, the last time my mom saw her mom was 32 years before, at the airport, giving her a hug, saying bye to her, and so this was a big deal for you and for her it was a big deal and like I kind of tried to because I didn't have a relationship with my grandma, Right.

Andrea: 47:47

Like I had talked to her once and I just rationalized and I was just like, how is this happening? Right? And so it was funny, because I was like, what am I doing? Okay, I'm gonna go pray and I am feisty, just like my Nona, Yep.

Andrea: 48:05

So so I went and I prayed, but it was not. It was not a good prayer, it was not a prayer, it was accusation and anger. And I was just, heavenly father, why would you do this, not to me, to my mom, like how, why would you give us hope and then just take her, you know, and keep in mind she's sick, she hasn't died. But I am just, yeah, I know, I know what's coming, I am right, you know, in the depth of sorrow and despair and I just, you know, I was just like you are cruel, like why would you do this? And yeah, so anyway, I, you know, huffed and I ended my prayer and like, for a bit, like this was over hours, I just ran to my room, closed the door, locked it and didn't let anyone in and just cried and all of this, and this went on for a while right, so that's what I'm getting at.

Andrea: 49:05

This went on for a while and finally I was just so exhausted and I was just like this isn't, this isn't working. Yeah, right, yeah, I feel worse, I feel angrier, I am, I am just. I don't know. I don't know what to do. I can't live with this right Like this is too much to bear.

Andrea: 49:28

Yeah, and it was in that moment that I just had the thought, like, just like Andrea, you know you can trust him, you know you've had that this happened, a soul crushing experience, and you gave it to him. Yes, you know right, and so it was just like duh. So, so I get back on my knees and I was just like you know what? I don't know, I don't know, I don't know how I'm going to do this, but I will be done you know, like you know, very snotty, but I will be done.

Andrea: 50:13

Yep, just just give me what I need to get through this, because I don't know what I'm going to do, like I don't know how I'm going to.

Lily: 50:21

I literally have no hope right now. I don't right.

Andrea: 50:23

And again, I'm very feisty, so anger is usually what I jump to, right Me too, and I did. I did right, yeah, but this overwhelming peace just otherworldly came over me and it was just, you know, like, I know, like I know I'm gonna take this. I know Um, and so after that, it was just you know, like okay, one hour at a time, and uh, she was in and out, she, you know like, she was actually discharged from the hospital for a minute, but I knew, I knew Um, and so she went back because she had pneumonia and uh, so that's actually what ended up taking her and um, it was. It was traumatic too, because in Venezuela the healthcare system is so bad my family couldn't get in to see her. They weren't allowing her family to see her because she had COVID and, um, she could be contagious, and so she, she passed and she was alone in the hospital and um, it was just, yeah, it was a terrible experience and um, the way they treated, you know, her body and the burial and stuff, it was inhumane.

Andrea: 51:49

And, thinking about it, like I talked to my friends about it and they were just like how terrible, like they were angry, and I was just like I'm angry, but like not as much as I would normally be, and so I was just like I was aware that this piece was still at play and lingering and so, um so she passed and I just spent the day with my mom and you know was just like I am a doer.

Andrea: 52:19

You know I am, I have to say but as the so I was just like mom. When she was younger, she told you that she wasn't getting baptized until she died. She just would so um, why don't we? This was in the end of February.

Lily: 52:36

Yeah Of 2022. This was 2023.

Andrea: 52:40

Yeah, so 2022 was when we heard about you know the legislation and stuff, okay, so it's been a whole year. So, yeah, yeah, a little bit less, but you know, um, but I was just like her birthday is in May. Why don't we? Why don't we do you know, like some family history? Oh, I should mention, sorry, backing up my patriarchal blessing. So that was the first thing, that story. The rest of it was so much about family history, so much and I had not really done family history at this point, like I had dabbled in it, but, and it even said work with your mother on this, um, and again, we got our patriarchal blessings the same day, right, yeah, and so, um, so anyway, so I had not actually dived into it, right, Um? And then I was just like you know what, Um, my patriarchal blessing says to do family history? It says that there is a long line of ancestors, that are waiting Right.

Andrea: 53:39

So let's do it. Let's do it, yep. So I told my mom we're going to do family history, we're going to set a baptism date at the temple for grandma and we're going to make it a party.

Andrea: 53:50

Okay, we're going to make it a party and so, um so, yeah, so we made a party, we went on May 27th to the temple and, uh, the majority of my family was there and we did a few baptisms for a whole bunch of family members. Yeah, now, um again, I had not dabbled, and one of the main reasons was because there were so many brick walls in my family history, so many Right.

Lily: 54:21

So once like, you can just go access the records.

Andrea: 54:23

No, every time that there's drama in Latin America, they burn the records, and so it's like this is impossible. This is an impossible task, right, and it was just so hard, like I watched my mom doing family history growing up. But like it was brick wall after brick wall yeah. Yeah, well, and this is one of those other duh moments.

Lily: 54:48

Okay.

Andrea: 54:49

So I was in my Nona past and I started working on family history. All of these brick walls Just lifted, lifted, lifted. I have literally over 2000 names in just the last year of people that I found. Really the majority of them are on her side specifically.

Lily: 55:08

She's like in heaven, like hey, you're right here, hey, you're right here.

Andrea: 55:14

And it was so crazy, and I was just like oh my gosh, this is not a coincidence, more than a coincidence.

Lily: 55:23

Right.

Andrea: 55:24

And so all of these, all of these names, like I would think of a last name, like that I was just working on, and then there would be new hints. I could not keep up with the hints and anyway it's so like all the record hints and stuff and so anyway. So since then I've I've gotten 2000 names, I you know like on mostly her side, and I'm still going. Like it's crazy how much, how many sources. I got like 16,000 sources almost last year.

Lily: 55:55

Just from February, the end of February to December, and is this because people have been indexing and stuff out there? Yeah, where are these coming from?

Andrea: 56:04

So there's tons of indexing going on in Venezuela and Colombia because she's she's from both and so, yeah, so just all of these indexing opportunities and like, and not only that, but I would also. I do crazy, I just go full crazy when I'm doing it and I will look for every variation of spelling. I go through the records, like I am going to find at least one master at reading handwriting.

Andrea: 56:32

Oh my gosh, I try to be my mom is way better, but yeah, it's, it's really hard because it's also in Spanish and like, although I speak Spanish, it's not, it's not my forte, and so it's it's hard and so, yeah, so I see all of these miracles, and not only that, but at the temple I just got, we were in the celestial room, my entire family, and it was just you were supposed to be here today. You were supposed to find these names, these names have been waiting, right, and so, like that, just you know that just rested on me and it was just so peaceful and it was just like you know what. I didn't realize this before.

Lily: 57:14

Right.

Andrea: 57:14

Right, but I, what I wanted the most was a relationship with my Nona. Yeah, and when I prayed I asked for what I needed to survive this. Yeah, and looking back, I was just like, oh my gosh, I have my relationship with my Nona, even though I can't see her, I can't talk to her, right, and she is constantly there helping me. It's incredible and so, anyway. So all of these like little miracles have happened in the temple, right.

Lily: 57:48

Sorry, do you mind if I just say something.

Andrea: 57:49

Oh yeah, of course, go on.

Lily: 57:52

I just think it's cool because when you were telling the story in the beginning, you specifically mentioned how she felt like it wasn't time to get baptized, like what. Like seeing this now like none of this would have happened.

Andrea: 58:04

Exactly had she been baptized.

Lily: 58:06

you literally. None of this would have happened Exactly, and so it was just like that's blowing my mind. This was all planned.

Andrea: 58:13

All planned, like it was all the Lord's timing, and and it's just so funny because I look back with 2020 vision, right, and I'm just like, oh my gosh, yeah, I lost total hope, but it's like this is so much better.

Andrea: 58:26

Yeah, you know, I could have taken to my Nona to Disneyland that and it would have been great, you know like I would have loved to have that time with her, but like I knew that I had a relationship with my dad's dad right, Even though he had passed Right, and I didn't even see that as an option, and it's like I feel just as close to my Nona as I do with my dad's dad which is pretty dang close, like I, you know, and so, yeah, so it, you know, all of these things have happened.

Andrea: 58:54

Every time that I go to the temple, I take family names, like I have not been to the temple. Wow, I have never been to the temple without a family name, and every single time there is something, there is something that I needed to hear, there's a feeling, there's a confirmation that I'm doing the right thing every time, and it's just, it's crazy and so so, anyway, so, yeah, so that is my story. Is all of these things, all of these coincidences, right, right, happen? And I was able to learn how to hear and, like you know, hear from him, hear from my heavenly father, and again, they were more than coincidences. It's looking back, perfectly aligned, perfectly aligned, perfectly written, because he's the author of our lives. Right, yeah, it was perfectly written, yeah best tele novella ever right it's mine so beautiful.

Lily: 59:57

Well, wow, I wish I had follow-up questions, but I feel like you are so thorough, like that was just. It is incredible and I think, yeah, just seeing everything when you reflect back of just how you're, how your family played such a big role even these horrible things that happen to you in your life ends up playing a big role, with your patriarchal blessing influencing all of that, being able to reflect back on to that and I love how you refer back to your patriarchal blessing, because I feel like that's something that I need to be better at, because I feel like I read it and I'm like, okay, I get it, read the scriptures, okay, I get it, choose the right, but but there is power. Yeah, there truly is power, and maybe there's that's something that I'm missing and I need to go back and I need to try and really say, okay, how can I?

Lily: 1:00:43

this is God's literal direction toward for me yeah like how can I take this more personally, just like you have? I think it's incredible thanks, yeah, it was.

Andrea: 1:00:51

And I should mention, like I specifically when, when my Nona died, I was like okay, we're gonna do. What can I do? I can pray, I can do family history.

Andrea: 1:01:00

I read my patriarchal blessing and it was like and that's when I realized, because I hadn't really noticed it before the the line where it said you have ancestors waiting on the other side for you. Yeah, and it was just like that hit me so hard in that moment and I was just like this is what we're supposed to be doing, this is why this happened, you know, like this is why it happened the way it did anyway. And so so, yeah, it was just. I have a huge, huge testimony about patriarchal blessings and how you can just you hear personalized messages for you at any given time in your life. You can just go look at it, and not only that, but when you go to the temple, you are putting yourself in a situation where you can actually hear from Heavenly Father too and get these, you know, not that you can't outside, but just especially at the temple. And so all of these things, I guess, prepped me for where to look when I needed yeah, needed a reminder of where to look, you know right?

Lily: 1:02:02

so yeah, thank you so much, and do you? Are there any other final thoughts that you have, or? I'm just floating around just advice you or one start family history because I feel like people think it's an old lady thing or people think it's too it's like really hard, like I do think that there's. We put these barriers in our brains yeah, clearly been told that we need to do it. So, and we have family search centers everywhere. Yeah, what, what would you say for someone to get started?

Andrea: 1:02:31

just do it, well, okay the advice is so simple just do it. Because I was. I had such a hard time with family search.

Andrea: 1:02:42

I, I did not like okay, now I'm like, oh my gosh, this is a breeze it's fine, I'm gonna help them, but honestly, like it is just just set a time, okay, to do it, and go and do it and it will bring you, like and it's. It's kind of funny because I talked about specifically my Nona and my grandpa and how I have close relationships with them, even though I didn't get to meet them in this life. Yeah, I feel like I have so many relationships that I just I've never met them, but I know them right and it's just it'll. It's so helpful, like it's. So it's so amazing knowing that you have so many people rooting for you on the other side you know.

Andrea: 1:03:25

So yeah, my advice is just do it okay, read your patriarchal blessing and just do your family history. So dang.

Lily: 1:03:33

I feel like I need to get better. I'm totally willing to help awesome, would you mind, then, just leaving us with a testimony? Yeah.

Andrea: 1:03:43

I, I have such a testimony that Heavenly Father is super aware of us at every single moment, that, especially in the moments that we don't feel like he's aware of us, he is so aware and he loves us so much and he has given us so much to be able to hear from him. Like he, he wants us to be able to hear him and so, yeah, my testimony is just he, he knows you, he loves you and he is the author of your life. He is putting things in place for you. You just got to be able to not be as stubborn as I was, and you know, look for it, seek it. So awesome.

Lily: 1:04:32

Well, thank you, andrea, for your time tonight and I really appreciate it. You're the best. Thank you, thanks again for tuning into more than coincidence, remembering Jesus Christ in your story. Please follow us on social media or share us with a friend. If you have an experience you'd like to share, feel free to reach out to more than coincidence. Dot remember him at gmailcom. I can't wait to hear all of the amazing memories you all have of our Savior. See you next time.